Commitment

I’m happy with my life as it is, b’cos I truly believe that a strong sense of self-esteem is the key to lifelong happiness and fulfillment. The most important commitment one can make to ones life is to love, honor and cherish ones’ self. Said all that… even though I enjoy having my own fabulously carefree life, I do want to share it with someone special.
To me, a commitment doesn’t necessarily have to be a legal paperwork, in other words “marriage”. It could be a mutual agreement between two people to date each other exclusively, OR simply living together to fulfill mutual desires with respect and loyalty to each other.
The need to legalize a relationship is necessary only when the hormones are in tune to form a whole new entity and that is when we say we are ready to start a family. Until then, as long as there is love, honesty and harmony in a relationship… it’s good enough a commitment.

Don’t try to be my lover… just be my friend!!

Do not judge me on false impulse. How well do you think you know me? Have I ever shared the account of my past with you? Have I ever told you anything about me that I wouldn’t tell any of my other friends? Have I ever poured my sobs on you? What makes you think I have feelings for you? More importantly… do YOU have feelings for me?

I’m a caring person by nature… I care about you not because it’s you, but because it’s me. I try to keep our friendship alive, not because I cannot bear to loose you, but because I don’t want to loose a friend. I don’t believe in “Friends with benefits”, and intimacy without affection is not my kind of thing. I can’t pretend something I don’t feel. Why should I date emotionally unavailable, jerks who don’t value me in the least, or settle for anything less than ALL that my heart desires out of a relationship?

I believe in being happy in my own skin and not wasting time with men who don’t reciprocate. So until you can FIND your way into my precious zone, don’t try to be my lover… just be my friend!

I love the rain

Every time it pours I am tempted to go out and enjoy it… feel its smooth rhythmic prick on my flesh. What I enjoy most is going for a ride in the rain… like I did yesterday. It was so much fun, riding through the puddles, water splashing from all sides, the few braves on the road shouting at our mischief… kekekek. One taxi driver even tried to race us down…hehehe. My sis and I rode for hours in the heavy rain before we stopped for a break to watch the surfing handsome hunks at sea… now that was a breath taker *wink*. What a day… hehehe. Indeed… a day loaded with fun and excitement… I just love the rain.

Bye Bye Holiday Blues

I had been so freaked out by the thought of holiday boredom, but now that its here, its not so bad… In fact, it’s going to be great!! I have come to understand that nothing can be so bad when you know how to deal with it. It’s all in the mind and the ability to make things happen. You can twist and turn situations and circumstances to suit your moods and needs. Now, I have got the whole holiday period planned out… hehhe!

Yesterdays’ picnic, with my kids, their classmates and parents was indeed a blast. The exciting games and the island exploration was most fun. Being the only group on the island… we had the whole Kuda Bados to ourselves. This was the first time I took my kids out of town by myself (without a family member). To watch them have so much fun with their friends was a real treat and for the first time I realized just how well behaved my kids are… naughty and teasing, yet well mannered! What more could a single mom ask for? They’ve made me a proud mom indeed.

If all goes according to plan… which I know it will… I’m all hooked up for the next too weeks. So don’t be surprised if you don’t see me around for the next couple of days. Hope you won’t miss me too much… ;)

The Moon!

The Moon has been a symbol of beauty and romance for centuries. And why not? It is the Moon that illuminates the romantic hours of the night. What fascinates me most is to watch the rising of the 16th moon… the big orange ball rising up the horizon with its reflection mirrored on the ocean. Truly an emblem of nature’s perfection. Tonight it looks extraordinarily stunning… its white perfection shines in a dark empty sky, with a large circular ring around it and not a single star anywhere near. It looks lonely though… How many nights has it shone its dazzling beauty like this? How many people have enjoyed it? How many couples has it witnessed in their intimate moments? Yet it still shines in its lonely dark sky, with not a single star for company… because that’s how it’s meant to be… stunning and alone… like me!

A wildcat on the loose!!

After a long wasted two months, I’m feeling myself again… the hyper active adrenaline effect is taking on; planning out new challenges at work, teasing and irritating friends just for the fun of it, playing football with kids, hanging out with new friends, eating like a pig heheh… the urge for new excitement and wildness flows in me, wonder what could be causing this? Is it the holidays? routine workouts? or… a newly found friendship? Whatever the reason… it feels great … like a wildcat on the loose.

Goodbye

I started this journey six years ago, to make a perfect family with me, myself and my kids. Some people are meant to be alone, without a companion. I consider myself lucky because I’ve got my kids. You and I have come a long way since we met. With you I have found a side of me that I didn’t realize existed… experienced things beyond my imagination. Because of you I have come to understand myself better and thus become a better person. But this is as far as we go, it is time to say goodbye and walk our different paths. But before we part, I just want to say… “Thank you, for the wonderful time and experiences you gave me… I will always cherish the moments we shared together. Goodbye!”